It's easy to be provoked these days; and easy to justify the actions afterward. However, it is better to remain humble, than to act a plum fool just because the flesh desires it.
Coming from an angry childhood to an angry adulthood, I was always provoked and always retaliated with a vengeance. I forgave after I succumbed to the desire of my flesh. For then I felt as if I had power over whom I considered to be my enemy.
Not understanding that God was not pleased with that type of attitude or behaviour, I continued until the Lord allowed me to suffer greatly for entertaining anger. Anger caused me to lose friends, family and meaningful relationships. I couldn't see past my anger. It was cold, dark and lonely inside and outside of my body. I missed out on the blessings God had stored for me. He allowed me to see what was waiting for me and how I could have prospered.
Becoming even more angry and bitter, I shouted at God, while tears flowed heavily down my face. Why me Lord? They provoked me! I tried to run, but they came after me! The Lord said, "It is not that you get angry, but your actions." "I have spared your life and forgave you. I have been provoked to anger by you and I showed mercy toward you. How then are you better than they?"
I had never heard it that way before. With all the anger, I had shown no mercy. I forgave, but only after I returned the pain. Never did the pleasure of harming them bring any healing to my soul; but it fed my ego and built up my pride.
After eating the words of the Lord, I tried a new thing. It hurt not to unleash anger upon my enemies head, but as I consistently tamed my flesh, through the word of the Lord, my soul waxed happy. Henceforth, the provoking stopped and the enemy of my flesh was defeated. I then received many blessings from the Lord, my life was preserved and I obtained healthy friendships and relationships. I could smile in the midst of those angry moments. No longer did it defeat me or others.
My chastisement brought destruction, while God's chastisement brought healing. It's better to die to fleshy desires than to live by them.
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